Dejavu

A friend of mine went through a divorce 3 years ago. Thankfully, they had no children. They parted ways because he had an affair, left her for another woman, and told her his new woman is way better than she is.

For the last 3 years, her ex has repeatedly attacked her, threatened her, told her how great his life is without her, etc.

At times, he wanted to meet with her over coffee, just to talk. He always told her that he is sorry for hurting her, but that he is a stronger person for it. He kept repeating to her some mumble jumbo that he would do it all over again. (My friend did not feel any need to meet for coffee.) THIS struck a chord with me for sure - if he says he wouldn't change the way his life went, wouldn't change a thing: then she needs to stay far away from him.

The fighting over property has been mild, yet constant. As recent as 3 months ago, he threatened to call the police on her for something that he lost in his moving around.

WELL, this week she got a wedding invitation from him! Really?

We had a long talk. Bottom line is that she is happy he has found a new family - but it will be without her in his life. She is free from wanting him back - he left her, and now that he is getting married my friend feels a certain freedom. She is more fully released from having to deal with him...in good or bad. This is a finality for her to move on and be healed.

Boundaries are OK and are healthy. Sometimes you have to move on in life without people who were a part of your life, however big or small.

There is such thing as Necessary Endings.

Super eery how I can relate to her story....NOT with my husband though. He has always been faithful.

God bless her. She has a brand new start in life and she is going to be great.